Moments missed

I have achieved what I set out to achieve.

Three months ago I had to swallow a big slice of humble pie and go and get a “proper job”.
Having enjoyed almost two years pushing myself forward as a professional speaker and building my business, I finally admitted to myself that good positive feedback was not enough! I had to pay the bills.
Since then I have worked hard and paid one or two bills with my “spoils of War”. War is probably the most appropriate word for it. The Construction industry is in a mess! Aggression and abuse are second nature, poorly priced work with unachievable targets make for a poor work environment. The skills of the workforce have been over ridden by admin staff hell-bent on procedures for everything from ordering a shovel to wiping your arse!
As I mentioned in my last blog I have become quickly part of the problem with my natural aggression shining like a danger beacon for all to see. Well I have finally bitten the bullet and switched the light off. I will hand the car keys back on monday and return to an uncertain future.

Why?

“What do you benefit if you gain the whole world but are yourself lost or destroyed”  luke 9:25

Having the salary and the company car are meaningless if I have lost my self-respect. If I have lost my direction. If I have lost my faith.
I have learned over the years that if I am happy then my family are happy. My whole belief system around addiction recovery is that you put yourself first. In my eyes it’s the only way to recover.  I never want to see my family unhappy therefore I am going to make some changes to allow myself to smile again.
There are so many people I see who work hard but spend their lives missing the truly magical moments. In the three months since I started my “proper job” I have missed out on Orla and Oliver receiving certificates of achievements. I have missed their sports day and missed Orla’s Talent show. I have also managed to miss Niall’s yr8 graduation ceremony. These are moments that I will never get back. These are magical moments that make life worth while. These are moments that I am not going to miss again.

So I am now going to plan my next few months to maximise my family time and start showing them the love and support they have shown me.

Live the Life

Tom